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| Seriously, would this man (who doubles as the Emperor from Star Wars) do something dishonest like deflate footballs? |
I was shocked, SHOCKED I tell you, to read last night that the NFL discovered the New England Patriots had deflated 11 of the 12 footballs used in the team's AFC Championship demolition of the Indianapolis Colts.
So far this morning, I have found people to be in three camps.
1. Of course the Pats cheated, that's what they do under Beli-cheat. HA!
2. The Pats totally didn't cheat. This is a class organization that does things the right way.
3. Who cares, they beat the Colts by 5,000 points. An extra 2 PSI in the football wouldn't change that.
The first two positions ignore the past history of the Patriots, who have obviously violated league rules before, but are far from the only team to do so. The third is a bit more defensible, but it seems to make the assertion that "if you cheat and blow out a team, we should just assume your cheating didn't affect the outcome because you won by so much."
That seems a bit intellectually dishonest though, because why then would a team cheat in the first place? Clearly they thought it would help them win.
So I think the proper response is to say that New England, given coach Bill Belichick's reputation for winning at all costs and getting creative with rule compliance, probably cheated.
Probably.
But we should also say that this was a minor offense and should be treated as such. There should be some discipline from the league, but talk of vacating New England's spot in the Super Bowl, and even the ridiculous cries for a rematch, are so far beyond a reasonable punishment for this particular crime.
A late round draft pick or two and a small fine should do the trick.
Now that we've established New England's probable "cheater, cheater pumpkin eater" status, let's tackle the conspiracy theory and chief excuse from Patriots fans: THE BALLS DEFLATED BECAUSE OF THE TEMPERATURE CHANGE FROM INSIDE TO THE COLD OUTSIDE AT GAME TIME!
